Parenting children with disabilities is a lot of work [as Homer would day, d’oh!]. When Sayer was younger, I always felt a bit “robbed” of down time. Neurotypically developing kids ( aka regular ‘ole kids) were usually granted down time to watch television, play video games or whatever, but because Sayer has autism, Dan and I were cautioned against letting Sayer be in his own world> We were advised by educators and therapist not to let Sayer engage in behaviors that are repetitive but soothing - meaning to “just stim.” So instead, we we vigilant and made sure he was nearly always “engaged.” Talk about searching for balance – I would have just settled for time to read one section of the paper with a cup of coffee.
As Sayer got older, we found that the week-end mornings were the toughest part of the week – Sayer was so well-scheduled at school he couldn't’just eat breakfast and hang. He did better when he had a visual schedule laid out for him in the morning that outlined his activities for the day. One more job for Mom. I know I’m not the only “autism mom” that wishes their kid would watch an hour or two of Saturday morning cartoons.
Today, wiser woman that I am, I realize that we can’t be super parents who are “on” all the time. When "regular ole' kids" play Wii for hours on end, ins't that a type of stimming? It is repetitive and pleasurable, but is that so bad? Nowadays, we try to strike a balance between letting Sayer indulge his favorite activities even when they are a tad “stimmy” versus pushing him to try new activities.
For example, Sayer LOVES Wallace and Gromit, particularly the movie “Curse of the Were-Rabbit” [ 85-minutes plus previews, yeah!]. We let him watch it about every other day, sometimes with one of us in the room and sometimes on his own. So far, he hasn't shown any ill effects, except that he likes to repeat one – and only one - phrase from the movie. Unfortunately, that phrase is “shoot the dog.” We are working on getting Sayer to day “Cheese, Gromit, Cheese” or “I do like a bit of Gorgonzola” instead.
If we don’t change, maybe we don’t deserve to be here - I’ve been waiting breathlessly for the return of Babylon 5, a science fiction classic I got into belatedly. I even co-opted one of its characters, Lyta Ale...
2 days ago